Grab your spice cream and join us for a new episode of LIVE! Klondike is ending the Choco Taco due to making too much money, so the boiz are drafting new treats for the ice cream truck. Pat really wants to eat an ice cream disk. Nate concocts a sponge with an ice cream log. Matt is off social media. Plus, what is the natural evolution of the taco? If Mexican food was Pokémon, what would each dish be? Is cinnamon spicy? I think that you should think that it should be real pasta…and it all happens LIVE!
Worst Unexpected Things to Happen to a Fish
Grab your scrum and meet us where the fresh water meets the salt water for a fishy new episode of LIVE! What are the most unexpected things that can happen to a fish? Pat is angry and doesn’t know why. Nate doesn’t care what dogs have to say. Matt would rather fly than have a billion dollars. Plus, what’s wrong with the swans in the Yellowstone? What is a penguin doing on Nate’s desk? How is migrating south like craving tacos? Feed me your blind, your poor. You’re a fish, I’m a fish, we’re all fish. And it all happens LIVE!
Things You Wish You Had in Your House
Grab your Nateuccino and join Al Pacino in the Bungalow for a new LIVE(ucchino)! What do you wish you had in your house? Matt reconstitutes his own feces molecules for dinner. Nate puts a knickknack shelf in his pool room. Pat gets a vending machine installed next to his front door. One of the three things you just read is actually true. Plus, where exactly is Niagara Falls? How many turtles are being eaten out there, human and gator combined? And is a cook a chef? Pull the Nate bust to get to the secret grotto and roast your beans on an all new LIVE!
Emojis You Want in a Fight
Grab your beep boop stuff and get charged by lightning on an all new LIVE! If you were going into a Battle Royale, what Emojis would you want on your side? Nate gets tricked into a contract with the devil. Pat gives a wedding update. Matt is framed for murder by a genie. Plus, is an android a robot? Is a witch a wizard or a warlock? Is science impervious to magic? It’s Gandalf the Grey (or White, don’t assume color) and he’s here to do it LIVE!
Ways to Save Baseball
Grab your Sod Poodles and fly to Honolulu for an all new LIVE! Baseball is dying but the Boiz are here to rescue it. Was baseball better with steroids? Should MLB employ sex workers? Does anybody have a better save percentage than Jesus? Plus, indulge in an embarrassment of mini-games, like “Name a Hockey Player,” “Is This a Real Baseball Team?” and the classic “Is this Nate’s Aha Pick?” Bases are points and bats have spikes and it all happens LIVE!
Beat the Heat
Grab your Winnie at the turn and play Nate Bingo with only one square on an all new LIVE! It’s the dawg days of Summer, so what are some ways to #BeatTheHeat? Nate hates the feeling of wet cloth in his mouth. Pat sells bottled hose water. Matt makes a questionable Amber Heard joke. Plus, has science ever tried flipping the ozone on its other side? Where does the ice cream sandwich rank among sandwiches? And how is global warming like boiling a hot dog? We’re migrating to Artica and it all happens LIVE!
Alternative Shoes
Grab your magnetic COVID onions and sleep with your socks on in an all new LIVE! What are some alternative shoes, and what exactly does that mean? Who has been snoffin’? Who wears socks with sandals? Have you ever read glue? Plus, you should see how many vats Leonardo DiCaprio has in his closet. Nate gets mad because someone sneaks in feet. And Kevin spills chili. All that and more and it all happens LIVE!
Least Important Holidays
Grab your useless ass pig and watch out for predatory birds on an all new LIVE! What are some meaningless holidays? Oklahoma celebrates Oklahoma Day. China celebrates a new year on a calendar that doesn’t exist. Rhode Island is the only state that celebrates Victory Over Japan Day. Plus, could Nate resist hut dogs at a baseball game? Is Easter a dessert holiday? Will a squirrel see its own shadow? And how bad has Matt’s word game addiction gotten? It’s time to celebrate Flag Day on an all new LIVE!
New Jurassic World Attractions
Grab your hut dog and meet us at the Carnivore Cave for a prehistoric episode of LIVE! Attendance is down at Jurassic World and the boiz are here to help drum up business. Pat has a huge reveal. Matt spares no expense. The podcast has its very first boom bow. Plus, is Nate scared of giraffes, bro? How many hot dogs is too many hot dogs? Would you gamble on weekly dinosaur fight nights? We’re talking megalodon measurements, baby, and it all happens LIVE!
Socks
Grab your Twinkie burgers and un-velcro your socks on an all new LIVE! What are some socks? The Boiz will tell you! Is it weird to sleep in socks? How did the change dish end up in the pillow? What one sense would you keep? Plus, Matt is rocking but nobody is socking. Nate alludes meanly about Pat. Pat gets triggered about dumb animals on Bluey. Sock means give and we are socking you an all new LIVE!
Miscellaneous Animalpox
Grab your nonfunctional man nipples and milk them for laughs as the boiz get infected on an all new LIVE! Matt saves the world by reverse-jinxing Monkeypox with his crippling fear. Pat steals from a tiny home. Nate does a nasty Nate. Plus, you guys ever get sick stink? Slime: pores or holes? Can you control your suction cups? Fever, chills, lethargic, and it all happens LIVE!
"Day of" Jitters
Grab your wedding gun and join us in a job interview with a monkey for a new episode of LIVE! What are some of the best and worst “day of” jitters? Pat gets fired up reminiscing about high school football games and putting his head through freshmen. New Nate alphas Old Nate. Matt gets anxious every April 1st. Plus, who won the donut eating challenge? What’s the worst that could happen on your proposal day? Are the boiz the absolute worst at improv games? The chicken is the cheese and it all happens LIVE!
Tattoos That Come to Life
Grab your tiny palm kitten and join us at the nearest tattoo parlor for a permanent new episode of LIVE! What tattoos would you get if they could come to life? Nate gets a tiny dragon to do his bidding. Matt tats his car keys on his hips. Pat puts his shoes into a bad boss. Plus, is John Hammond a dinosaur? Is Nate an FBI agent? Does Pat have an evil Clippy? All that and more and it all happens LIVE!
The Perfect Beach Day
Grab your gnar and shred it on an all new episode of LIVE! The boiz are going to tell you what to pack for the perfect day at the beach. No day is complete without four hours of lonely brooding. Don’t forget your flesh-colored bathing suit! We’ll bring the fries. Plus, could you surf one wave to save your family? Would Pat read during commercial breaks if it meant he could go to the Super Bowl? What secret did Matt uncover about his wife? It’s one if by land, two if by snow, and it all happens LIVE!
Build-a-Book
Grab your striped tire and head to the loberry for a new episode of LIVE! Nate is a #BookGuy now so we’re assembling a book using characters, conflicts, genres, and settings seemingly at random. In Old Timey America, Tim Ramblesong is trying to live a quiet, flag-folding, bed-making life as the head of the neighborhood watch. On Mars, an alien/human hybrid searches for his doughy, sports car-driving father. Somewhere, Waldo hides. Plus, Nate burns through two internets trying to stay in the conversation. Trivia Jeff triggers a hole eating contest. Pat does a cold open. All that and more and it all happens LIVE!
Best Celebrity Biopics Using Only Material From That Person's Future
Grab your charged punches and get ready to be hit with a new episode of LIVE! Who are some celebrities who will have great biopics using just material from their lives starting today onward? Johnny Depp wins an Oscar for portraying Morgan Freeman. Ezra Miller works at a gas station. Tom Holland lives a basic rich and famous life with no issues. Plus, Is Pat trying to copy Matt by being really sick? What does it mean if a song slaps? How old was that commercial come out? Michelle “The Rock” Obama is here and it all happens LIVE!
The Sensations of Space
Grab your hunk of space cheese and join us in Nate’s fridge for a moon-sized episode of LIVE! What does space smell, taste, feel, and sound like? Connect the Dippin’ Dots as the Boiz travel through the atmosphere and explode in the vacuum of infinity. What is sound? Is a bunch of flavors just one flavor? Is Ground Pepsi the opposite of Space Coke? Plus, What is proper group chat etiquette? Will you get chaffed? And what moment has all three hosts literally gasping for air? Prepare yourself: it all happens LIVE!
Brain Storms
Grab your mystery object and pick your teeth with us on an all new episode of LIVE! The boiz are brain storming brain storms, an idea just vague enough to never be fully explained or understood. Julia Roberts is here (no she’s not) and the brand is stronger than ever. How many holes is a donut? Is an earthquake a storm? Is this the longest running podcast you’ve never heard of? It’s cloudy with a chance of brain balls and it all happens LIVE!
Punishments for Will Smith
Grab your boxing gloves and meet us at the Dolby for a pay-per-view episode of LIVE! What should Will Smith’s punishment be for slapping Chris Rock? Pat thinks he should work retail for two years. Matt thinks he should have to act in a shot-for-shot remake of “Independence Day: Resurgence.” Nate thinks he should have to come on the pod to discuss. Plus, what is the one April Fools prank that Nate’s dad pulls off every year? Is Adam Sandler a scientist? How much would you pay to watch Connor McGregor play board games with Muhammad Ali? L. Ron Hubbard is just Paul Blart spelled backwards and it all happens LIVE!
Nice Things (or Things That are Nice)
Grab your doll and show us where Pat was mean to you on an all new LIVE! We’re being nice this week, so everyone better be on their best behavior. Pat is confronted about his deeply rooted Falcon issues. Nate neglects his dog. Matt is a gift of God. Plus, where did Jackie Chan go? is Brendan Fraser back? Does Keanu Reeves always finish last? All your burning celebrity questions are answered and it all happens LIVE!